I don’t make a habit of revisiting films I’ve made, but this was not the first time I’d returned to this one: a few years back, I watched it with my daughter, who was ten at the time. For this edition, I participated in an interview about the movie, as did other people close to the production. Photograph from Universal Pictures / EverettĮarlier this year, the Criterion Collection, which is “dedicated to gathering the greatest films from around the world,” released a restored version of “ The Breakfast Club,” a film written and directed by John Hughes that I acted in, more than three decades ago. In a world where we often seek compatible playmates through online profile photos, negotiating that spark of attraction in person, with the help of a low-tech system, could be a refreshing return of old-school ingenuity.It’s hard for me to understand how John Hughes (in glasses) was able to write with so much sensitivity, and also have such a glaring blind spot.
Herein lies the potential for confusion: with at least six different blues and six different pinks, can you really know you’re seeing the same color intended by the wearer? Just ask! Maybe this is the best thing about the hanky code: it’s an icebreaker and a conversation starter. Mosquito Netting = Outdoor Sex (that’s just being pragmatic).Gold Lamé = Muscleboys (think Rocky Horror).Dark Pink = Nipple Torture (might make them that color).Light Pink = Dildos (they’re often that color).Dark Green = Daddy/Boy Scene (a relative of the hustler green?).Obviously some thought and logic went into the system of choosing which colors represent which scenes, and if you check out this expanded reference, you’ll see the system specialized even further.
#GAY SEX PARTY BLIND BOTTOMS CODE#
This is where it can get complicated, depending on your source of information, but we will keep it simple with some agreed-upon basics:įor those who like to keep their options open and/or reject all of this with a flat “I don’t like labels,” take note of the flexibility inherent in this system: You can change your colors as quickly as your mood shifts, wear several colors at once, switch sides if you change your mind, and for the truly versatile, why not wear the same color hanky in both pockets to indicate your openness to different roles! The Hanky Code For Gay Men, Gay Sex, Palm Springs The second signal is the color you wear, which specifies the scene or sex act you are seeking. Therefore, when “reading” the backside of a hanky-wearing man, if he’s wearing it on the side that “comes first,” he identifies as top/dominant, and if it’s on the side that “comes second,” he’s bottom/submissive. Similarly, the top/dominant role is primary, with the bottom/submissive being secondary. Right side of the body = Bottom/Submissive RoleĪs a way to remember which is which, consider that we read left to right, so left comes first.Left side of the body = Top/Dominant Role.So how do you know which color to wear, and where to wear it? The first critical variable is the side of the body on which you choose to wear your colors, because this signals your preferred role:
With just a glance at your rear end, (the bandana being tucked in your back pocket) anyone who is in-the-know will know what you’re “into!” Originating in the early 1970’s in either New York or San Francisco (let’s not even try to settle that debate), the hanky code is a system of signaling sexual preferences, fetishes, and roles by choosing to wear a specifically colored bandana on a particular side of the body. Quite often in “Grindr” chat, this is shortened to be simply “into?” - just like ships used cyphers (flags) to communicate, we gay men have our own way to communicate sexual preferences and proclivities. When two men are negotiating a sexual encounter or even compatibility to date, the phrase “What are you into?” will inevitably come from one or both. (Editor’s Note: With the new “mask when going out” regulations for Greater Palm Springs, we thought it was time to revisit the Hanky Code and consider applying it to wearing one on your face!)